Matthew 18:21-35 21 Then
Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother
or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?”
22 Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times,
but seventy-seven times.
23 “Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a
king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. 24 As he
began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand bags of gold was
brought to him. 25 Since he was not able to pay, the master
ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to
repay the debt.
26 “At this the servant fell on his knees before him. ‘Be
patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay back everything.’ 27 The
servant’s master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go.
28 “But when that servant went out, he found one of his
fellow servants who owed him a hundred silver coins. He grabbed him and began
to choke him. ‘Pay back what you owe me!’ he demanded.
29 “His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged
him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay it back.’
30 “But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man
thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. 31 When the other
servants saw what had happened, they were outraged and went and told their
master everything that had happened.
32 “Then the master called the servant in. ‘You wicked
servant,’ he said, ‘I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. 33 Shouldn’t
you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ 34 In
anger his master handed him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should
pay back all he owed.
35 “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of
you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”
Luke 17:4 Even if
they sin against you seven times in a day and seven times come back to you
saying 'I repent,' you must forgive them."
Conflict is part of life. It may originate from
misunderstandings, a difference of opinion, or deep convictions. But oftentimes,
discord stems from envy, pride, or hunger for power.
No one can control another person’s response to conflict;
we’re accountable only for how we handle it. Sadly, many people have unhealthy
reactions to disagreement. Some ignore the issue or pretend it doesn’t exist.
Others place blame while defending themselves.
These negative responses often indicate one of three
underlying scenarios. First, past hurts can leave a person emotionally insecure
and unable to handle criticism. Second, a perfectionist sets such high
benchmarks that he can never live up to his own standards—then it’s hard to
acknowledge mistakes. Finally, pride makes it hard for some to admit when
they’re wrong or to ask forgiveness.
Unless we respond correctly to conflict, we limit our
potential to grow, because we aren’t learning what the Lord is teaching. Also,
we can develop an unforgiving spirit, which leads to bitterness and resentment.
Eventually, such an attitude can destroy relationships.
There is also a positive way to handle conflict. Luke
23:34 reveals how our Savior responded when He was wrongly accused,
unfairly judged, and killed for something He didn’t do. Jesus prayed, “Father,
forgive them; for they do not know what they are doing.”
How do you deal with accusations and criticism? Forgiveness
is the only response that will keep you from becoming a victim of bitterness.
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